A blog where I share my stories on the journey towards my happily ever after. *hee-hee*

NOW, you can share your stories with "My Wedding". The proposals, the preps, the good, the bad and everything in between! :D :D :D

Email me at : ann.j1010@gmail.com

Thursday, 31 December 2009

-={@ 2010 @}=-


Assalamualaikum~

I'm back to the beloved country... yes, didn't really go overseas that long~ It was honey-money afterall kan?... :D got stuffs yg i wanted but yg REALLY wanted nada! *boo-hoo* A little update, FINALLY did our POSTWED PHOTOSHOOT and it was faaaabulous!!! Well, I hope it would be..~ Tunggu and lihat saja nanti k?? Hehehe!!

But anyways~, in the matter of hours it'll be 2010! And next Tuesday is the 1st year anniversary of our 'adat bersuruh' Inda sangka ah..? *sigh* More weddings of friends to attend *Alhamdulillah* (Hubby and I can hear some rumour of wedding bells coming along in 2010 *WOO-HOO!* You guys can't hide from us :P :p :P but we can hide from you~~~ ) and the first for 2010 would be my photog's Sanding function. Congrats Ucingitam and wife for the solemnization last 18th December 2009. And insya-Allah we'll make it on the day nanti :D

I know I promised all to talk pasal room renovation, but I believe I did so talked about it last time? So.. feel free to check out the link below ani yeh? Don't wanna flood much of my entry.. so yeah~ :D :D :D Been trying hard to find out how to change "anda mungkin juga meminati" to "you might also like" ... cali sulnya? no? I know we utamakan bahasa Melayu here in Brunei, but this blog is merely random rants and talks about weddings... so if ada orang yg pandai sana atu? or the fiance or hubby tau cemana and what's the cause, please leave me a chat k? TQ~

Lastly, AGAIN!!! SELAMAT TAHUN BARU HIJRAH 1431H dan MASEHI 2010. May next year be a better year for all of us... insya-Allah~

Monday, 21 December 2009

PLAN PLAN PLAN.. for 2010!! : Part II

Salam and aloha~

I'm sooooo excited now that I am somewhere overseas enjoying the sales! Bought a cute dress yesterday~ Hubby finds it cute..shopping mode blum ON sangat cos sana sini laawa baaah! :( *sob* Anyhoos, before I set off to go and do MORE shopping. Let me continue the PLANNING update.

Step 6 : Pelamin. This normally you survey around dulu and then, book and deposit latest 3 months before your wedding. My likes were by Maszalina Boutique (house event), Roz Flower Boutique, Ruzz Pelamin and Nurhayana (the 3 boutiques provides house and hall pelamins) . The pelamin business is ever so growing that even RN Wedding pun do decos and pelamins jua. So yes, I would advise everyone to go round and do your surveys and choose which one suits your budget and likings! :D OR if you fancy some new designs for your pelamin. Enquire the boutique awal2 so that they can do their part of preps as early as they can.

Step 7 : Doorgifts (or Souvenirs, as it has been well-known to most). This one, what me and my sister did was to identify events yg we want to bagi souvenirs, namely yg berjemputan saja lh.. yg family only ndada hehehe :
  • Nikah, ___ ppl @ $____/person
  • Berbedak, ___ ppl @ $___/person + ___ppl membadaki @ $___/person (bleh jua kn bgi different for male and female)
  • Sanding,__ppl@ $___/person, some couple pun suka giv diff. doorgifts for little kids e.g snacks, lollies and the likes.
Note to all, price of doorgifts atu must includes packaging :) Ideas can be like ranges to lots of stuffs which can be used by our guests. I would prefer if kna bagi that little notebook for all, dpt jua scribble2 stuffs in it OR maybe fridge magnets to those yg berkemampuan? OR maybe.. hrmmm, kes paning2 just give green packets? no? *hee-hee* But ofcourse, to most, they still prefer dry biscuits, cookies, cupcakes, brownies, local snacks like sapit, baulu, penyaram, kuih cincin and the likes... *sigh* Even mentioning them makes my tummy grumble! Oh-my!!

Step 8 : Having sorted, the venue, invitation card, catering, pelamin, doorgifts, baju, make-up and photog...now you only have to worry about Decos! This includes :
  • Hall / House - aisle to the pelamin / driveway. Mine was just few lanterns from Roz Flower Boutique and it's lovely!! i wished I could keep them all hehe...
  • Car (for the groom) - own car deco, of which you need flowers, chiffons and ribbons (easily available at HOKKO or Buttons and Lace or Happy Star)...OR package with the catering services (FREE provided yang mengambil the catering atu the Pengantin lelaki side himself..if us ladies, inda jua dapat tu... unless kahwin di dewan and tani berhias dirumah, THAT maybe negotiable.. )
  • Wedding Arch - ALL flower boutiques offers this one. So you have nothing to worry of, EXCEPT if lambat buat decisions. Last week as i was going out for lunch with a friend of mine I saw one Arch yang I really loike~ I loooooiiiikkkeee berabis! That I even tell my friend to get it for her wedding!! *lol* The arch I saw was at Ami-Yani Bridal Boutique d Pandan 4, KB (sebaris DST)
  • Stairway - self deco (abit cheaper *winks*) or tempah if you think the deco you wish for is cheaper being done by the experts. I would prefer either way for my place but considering $$ was needed for something else so I skipped that and ended up buying lining with only costs about $1.50/m and bought like double the length of my staircase. My sisters all did the same thing as well..so that makes me no different. :D
  • Room - normally package with the stairway deco and car and aisle.. but most of us prefers to have our own room decorated by ourselves right? hehehe but the easiest bit would recycling and improvising the concept of what's in your room before to something more elegant and smart. :)
Step 9 : Room renovation... of which, I will touch on room renovation in my new post nanti.. ~

The shops are already calling my name! Hehehe~ I gotta run dulu.. til nxt time yeah?

~xoxo~

Wednesday, 16 December 2009

YELL-O!!!

My last entry on theme was last October, sorry for that. I came across a few yell-o themes for next yr's bride-to-bes! Couples are getting moore and more daring nowadays, maroon / burgundy *coughs*, pink, magenta, purple... even YELLOW!

Here we have yellow and black~ notice the heels.. nice ey? Buat baju pun bisai tu.. get a black lace aND yellow lining and voila~ you have a chic modern wedding dress!

This pelamin I must say is simple, playing with the flower deco and lighting jdinya ia appear jdi yellow :D

Loving the table deco...suitable for meja pengantin.. simple AND elegant! Ofcourse to make it even more elegant, use yellow roses instead of sunflower. Another romantic touch I must say~

to compliment that.. kerusi pengantin pun dsign like this lah? cana? No need to cover up the whole chair if u can't, just get some lining kain to tie the ribbons around your chairs like so~ ;)

another 'regal' theme for yellow~ classic pelamin but modern baju.. sapa berani?

yellow invitation card~

yellow wedding cake

yellow wedding bouquet.. NOT to be used with yellow baju tho! Else it wouldn't stand out, the flower should be used either with white, brown or black ;) turqoise, apple green.. basically jgn kuning and kuning lh..

I have yet to continue my 'planning' entry. insya-allah by end of this week yeh? until then..

~Salam~

Monday, 14 December 2009

PLAN PLAN PLAN.. for 2010!!

Assalamualaikum ladies..~

With the new year coming up (both Hijriah and Masehi) I would like to wish upon everyone Selamat Menyambut Awal Tahun Hijriah 1431. New year, new styles and new newly weds! :D

As I was reading the chatbox the past few days, I could see that I somehow forgotten to put in on HOW I PLANNED OUT my wedding. It's more or less like what reader has explained in the cbox but I think, better tah I explained in details lagi. Just so not to get all confuse. My sister really helped me out with this one.

Step 1 : List out events for your wedding ceremony. Where and when will it take place? This will give tani the idea of brapa orang kan dijemput untuk satu2 event atu.. e.g. Nikah @ Masjid, surely you would want just close family and friends saja yg hadir kan? or Berbedak and Sanding @ Hotel / Hall... check with the hotel/hall :
  1. harga sewa and deposit
  2. ramai org ya bleh accomodate (Maximum)
  3. meja & kerusi provided or not? roundtable kah meja panjang mcm camp style
  4. how long before the function can we mobilise into the place.
  5. room for dressing up
  6. catering they provide or not (for hotels)
  7. entertainment services (some place provide their own entertainment services whilst the others we normally prefer either tausyikh, dzikir, hadrah, gulintangan or just simply get a CD with the mixture of all hehe cheaper kan?)
Step 2 : Once sudah dapat all the infos d atas atu, then you decide no. jemputan yg kn d jemput for each event. Whether or not you want to have different invitation cards for each function or just inserts dlm ur invitation card for different events atu. D safest way would be combining all the details of other events atu in just 1 invitation card. Then again, ikut $$$ lh. You might wanna go the cheaper way of printing ur own invitation card urselves OR at our local printing shops OR go online and customade ur own cards overseas... manaja yg you want and within the budget.

Step 3 : Catering. If you're the type yang rajin mengaga org kawin.. no harm in doing food testing on the spot. I'm sure most caterers will leave their leaflet on the food table OR better yet, check out their uniforms for phone no.s and keep them safe for survey purpose. Things to look out for catering :
  • the food they serves (check the package as to what they offer)
  • other stuffs they provide like tents, chairs and table, tablecloths, platforms, fans, PA system perhaps?
  • facilities like fluorescent lamps for tent (especially those yg ada event malam)
  • services like serving drinks and sweets during the scorching hot day event (normally org suka ni)
If semua ani dpt di offer at a reasonable price and +ve feedbck frm others.. might want to take that into consideration? UNLESS, you prefer to rent the tents, tables and chairs elsewhere.. caterer from the small restaurant next door pun I'm sure not a problem (normally cheaper ni cemani and ofcourse nyaman!) check lh saja the difference between the prices. :D

Step 4 : Baju. Upon dciding your events, location and caterers.. here comes the best part. The wedding attire. Normally prices of rental for baju songket ranges from ($300-$600) dpending on what you want. Price is inclusive with accessories like tiara sets, veil, brooches, bracelets and the likes. For baju nikah, if I'm not mistaken.. as far as I rmember it's ranging from $150-$200. again dpending on whether u want to customade a nnew one or just rent the existing. If u ask me, if you can afford to buy the kain (which I'm sure Jakel in KK or KL is on SALE at the moment) might as well beli kain utk baju Nikah atu right? A reader once asked me, yes they sale it cheap BUT dpending on which type of beaded lace you prefers. :) :) :)

Step 5 : Make-Up and Photog (and maybe video). I samakan saja in this 5th step cos they are EQUALLY IMPORTANT! Make sure you do trials for Make-Up AND book them as early as possible pasalnya, the good ones selalu kena book awal. But then again, as you go to Bridal Shops, kdg2 they offer their make-up service package with the baju2. As for photog and video (ani you all mesti weigh it out), some prefer to have both where as I preferred to have just pictures. Enquiry these ppl on the availabilities awal2 k? To avoid disappoinntment...

Step 6 : to be continued... hehehe

Thursday, 10 December 2009

...dedications!!!...

CONGRATULATIONS TO MY GALS!!

A dear friend of mine, Nor (bukan nama sebenar) just tie the knot this early weekend of December. And silly me for not putting in the greeting for her... she and her hubby is still on their honeymoon~ *sweet* hehe me jua yg alum atu kan? But mine will come up sooon.. Insya-Allah~ *whee!!*

A week before that, another dear friend of mine, Siti (bns) got engaged. Congrats to you too babe~ Hope to have a taste of your 'Nasi Minyak' next yr! ;)

They were both oh-so-gorgeous!! I wish you gals the very best!!! *AMiN*

Tuesday, 1 December 2009

a true story [for the LADIES]


Salam,

I'm sure it's not too late to wish everyone Selamat Menyambut Aidiladha~ Sorry for the late update, been having moodswings (time of the month) the past few days... yth, I've got no mood to post a new entry.

I've been meaning to post up this entry, something a dear friend of mine wishes to share with you all. Identity remains anonymous. You all may find this story abit off but it's good to take note.

A dear friend of mine wanted to share this story to all... I guess she wanted us to be prepared with the possibility of
BUNTING PELAMIN. Yes, yes.. the very significant pepatah melayu (Pepatah Melayu kh Peribahasa ah?) I'm sure eeeeevvvery ladies wishes to grasp. *Insya-Allah* :) Rezeki masing-masing, and kitani hanya mampu merancang. Apparently, ramai jua orang dapat bah ah..unless, yes.. time kahwin atu *coughs*...

Obviously the next step we want in our married lives would be, having babies! Yes, I would dream to have sebanyak2nya... they're just cute! Insya-Allah~ *AMIN* So this friend of mine kan... she got pregnant immediately lapas ya kahwin but she didn't realised it (ofcourse siapa jua kan tau?) until she missed her period and did a home pregnancy test. This was 5 weeks after her Sanding. She was overwhelmed but didn't want to go to the clinic just yet but her constant headache was bugging her. Tepaksa diheret ke clinic ni baru ya mau... Banar!!

Unfortunately, when she finally made it to the clinic... she had a minor bleeding of which she thought was just "spotting" but flowing... try to Google this up yeah ladies~ So..she told the doctor that she's pregnant, first pregnancy, suffering headaches AND bleeding at the same time! The doctor instantly looked worried as she told her abt the bleeding, she said. She was then immediately referred to the Gynae Clinic @ the Hospital and was told that she's in a situation of a threatened miscarriage!!! *gasp* The doctor did asked her what she's been doing the past few days before the bleeding, any excessive exercise? and what she eats? Then, I abruptly asked, '
Apa saja yg nda dpt d makan ani kan?'

Apparently ladies~~ once you know that you're preggy please, please, pleaaaase
avoid eating pineapple, anything hot, capsicums, peppers and papaya not forgetting coffee~ Avoid being all stressed out with work! Apparently, my friend had all those.. nafsu and dugaan bulan Puasa kan? Then again, it's just a precaution..some ladies makan jua, stress jua and all those, pun pregnant all the way jua. Rezeki kan? I guess It's just wasn't meant to be for her. A few days after she booked herself for gynae, she had a miscarriage. Her pregnancy was just 6 weeks old masa atu and she had to recover herself for 3 months (3 kli period lh tu?!?) before she could get pregnant again..

I felt sorry for her as she told me this. Dugaan Allah, maybe it's not time yet babe... Wallahuwa'lam~

Kesian though, she didn't have the chance to tell us that she's pregnant..tau2 we heard the news that she miscarried. That's why she wanted me to share this story in my blog... to let us all know, do's and don'ts. Why not kan?

Thanks love, insya-Allah after 'cuti' atu belurih tu~!~ *Amin*

Thursday, 19 November 2009

something for all..

Counting the days before my solemnization ceremony last August (*sigh* it still feels like I'm only married last weekend..), I've gotten into a situation of maximum anxiety. Nervous ada..butterflies ada...itu salah...ini salah.... eeeee..mcm2!! There was even a brief moment when I burst into tears pasal reaaaally stressed out... Believe me, semua itu adalah NORMAL!

Me and Mr.A did find some interesting MUST-DO things before Nikah..and Alhamdulillah, implementing them.. butterflies? nervous? apakan tu?!! Since tomorrow's Friday, I thought I share this with you all~ pyh mencari the files arh my folder ah. I know I have put this one in before... click HERE

My apologies.. ~

Tip menjelang Akad Nikah...

# Sembahyang Hajat malam sebelum upacara akad nikah untuk memastikan kelancaran majlis. Prevention for anything that could go wrong during the function.

# Amalkan
Surah Al-Inshirah (Alam-Nashrah) untuk mengurangkan rasa debaran menjelang detik dinikahkan. Surah itu juga yang diamalkan Nabi Musa ketika berdepan firaun. Not forgetting, "Rabbi Yassir wala Tu 'Assir Ya Kareem..." meaning = Ya Allah, permudahkanlah segala urusanku..

# Bakal pengantin lelaki juga boleh mengamalkan
Surah Toha (Ayat 25 - 28) untuk mengurangkan darah gemuruh. Selesai membaca, bolehlah minum segelas air untuk penenang jiwa. - time2 dalam kereta tu bawa byk bertasbih (Subhanallah), bertahmid (Alhamdulillah) and bertakbir (Allahu'akbar)

# Selepas dinikahkan, seeloknya pengantin lelaki menunaikan sembahyang Sunat Syukur dua rakaat sebagai bersyukur kerana berjaya menempuh alam perkahwinan. Selepas itu, sarungkan cincin ke jari isteri.

# Pengantin lelaki juga harus bersalam dengan ibu bapa dan ibu bapa mentua, hadirin dan sahabat handai. Bersalaman adalah tanda kesyukuran dan rasa gembira kerana semuanya sudah sempurna.
My advance congratulations to G228 and YE20 for their Nikah tomorrow. *tabur2 bunga rampai!* Mudah-mudahan semuanya berjalan dengan lancar and rumahtangga yang dibina kekal bahagia ke akhir hayat... *Amin*

Additional dzikir utk dibaca balik2 sampai caaaaaaaaaaaaalm rasanya~ I use it to relieve stress..applicable to any situation.. I know tani kadang mengusut nda tantu pasal kan? You know, time of the month and all~ So, a good friend of mine taught me this zaman sekolah dlu... thanks babe~

"La Ilaha Illa Anta, Subhanaka Inni Kuntu Minaz-Zalimeen.."

Meaning : "There is no God but Allah, You are far exalted and above all weaknesses, and I was indeed the wrongdoer.."

For those of yous yang ada additional tips lagi... feel free to click on the 'Comment' Link below. :)

Sunday, 8 November 2009

TANGGUNGJAWAB TERHADAP KELUARGA

Salam... I've been meaning to post up this entry following the Khutbah entry pasal wedding $$$ few months back and now, baru th terpost~ Anyhoots, this one was recited in 2004... thanks to the Pelita Brunei archives.. :)


13 Muharram 1425/05 Mac 2004

Sidang Jumaat yang dirahmati Allah,
Marilah kita mempertingkatkan ketakwaan kita kepada Allah Subhanahu Wataala dengan sebenar-benar takwa dengan mengerjakan segala suruhannya dan meninggalkan segala apa jua tegahannya, mudah-mudahan dengan jalan sedemikian kita akan selamat di dunia dan di akhirat.

Wahai kaum muslimin,
Keluarga adalah institusi terpenting bagi sesebuah masyarakat, kukuh keluarga maka akan kukuhlah masyarakat, bangsa dan seterusnya kukuhlah perpaduan negara. Setiap anggota keluarga mempunyai tanggungjawab masing-masing yang mesti dipikul dan ditunaikan demi kepentingan dan kemantapan sesebuah keluarga.

Setiap orang mempunyai tanggungjawab mengikut kedudukan, tugas dan peranan masing-masing. Dalam keluarga misalnya, suami adalah ketua rumah yang memainkan peranan penting dan bertanggungjawab memimpin rumahtangga dan mengawal ahli-ahli keluarganya. Manakala isteri pula bertanggungjawab menjaga rumahtangga dengan membantu suami dan bekerjasama dalam usaha mengujudkan rumahtangga yang bahagia berlandaskan ajaran agama Islam.

Namun dalam era dunia global dan moden ini, kita dapati institusi keluarga juga mengikut era tersebut sehingga menimbulkan suasana yang membimbangkan dan tidak aman. Ini jelas apabila terdapat di antara suami tidak melaksanakan tanggungjawab yang diamanahkan oleh Allah Subhanahu Wataala kepada mereka sebaliknya mereka sendiri menjadi penyebab kepada kemusnahan keluarga ibarat kata pepatah harapkan pagar, pagar makan padi. Di antara tanggungjawab yang diabaikan itu ialah saperti tidak memberikan nafkah (perbelanjaan ke atas tanggungan mereka), tiada memberikan kasih sayang, tidak memperdulikan kesihatan dan kebajikan isteri dan anak-anak termasuk pendidikan, lebih buruk lagi sehingga sampai ketahap mendera isteri dan anak-anak, mencabul kehormatan anak atau sumbang mahram, bersifat panas baran, mementingkan diri sendiri dan sebagainya. Jika ada salah satu perkara yang disebutkan ini ada pada suami, setentunya rumahtangga tidak akan aman bahkan akan menimbulkan keretakan dan kemusnahan kepada rumah tangga yang dibina.

Dalam struktur sesebuah keluarga, suami berperanan sebagai pemimpin atau ketua dalam keluarganya, menjaga isteri dan anak-anak. Dan suami memikul amanah dan tanggungjawab yang sangat besar dalam mengujudkan kebahagiaan keluarga bukan sahaja di dunia malahan juga di akhirat, kerana suami dikurniakan beberapa kelebihan oleh Allah Subhanahu Wataala sebagaimana firmannya dalam surah An-Nisaa, ayat 34 :-

Tafsirnya :
Kaum lelaki adalah pemimpin dan pengawal yang bertanggung jawab terhadap kaum perempuan, oleh kerana Allah telah melebihkan orang-orang lelaki dengan beberapa keistimewaan atas orang-orang perempuan dan juga kerana orang-orang lelaki telah membelanjakan (memberi nafkah) sebahagian dari harta mereka.

Muslimin yang dirahmati Allah,
Suami adalah bertanggungjawab memberikan nafkah kepada tanggungannya iaitu isteri dan anak-anak. Nafkah yang dimaksudkan ialah menyediakan segala keperluan isteri dan anak-anak saperti makanan, pakaian, tempat tinggal dan kemudahan-kemudahan yang lain, sebagaimana yang diperintahkan oleh Allah Subhanahu Wataala dalam firmannya dalam surah Ath-Thalaaq, ayat 7 :-

Tafsirnya :
Hendaklah orang yang mampu memberi nafkah menurut kemampuannya dan sesiapa yang disempitkan rezekinya, maka hendaklah ia memberi nafkah dari apa yang diberikan oleh Allah kepadanya sekadar yang mampu. Allah tidak memberati seseorang melainkan sekadar kemampuan yang diberikan Allah kepadanya. Orang-orang yang dalam kesempitan hendaklah ingat bahawa Allah akan memberikan kesenangan sesudah berlakunya sesusahan.

Berdasarkan perintah Allah Subhanahu Wataala mengenai kewajipan nafkah, suami adalah berdosa jika tidak menunaikan tanggungjawab sebagai suami, kerana suami wajib mencari nafkah untuk tanggungannya. Di samping memberi nafkah itu suatu kewajipan, ia juga boleh memupuk perasaan kasih sayang, kesetiaan dan persefahaman antara suami isteri dan ahli keluarganya, kerana adalah menjadi kesalahan jika suami hanya mengharapkan nafkah daripada isteri.

Wahai kaum muslimin,
Tanggungjawab seorang suami akan bertambah berat lagi jika tanggungannya bertambah seperti mempunyai isteri lebih dari seorang iaitu poligami. Walaupun berpoligami dibolehkan di dalam Islam, tetapi hendaklah memenuhi syarat-syaratnya iaitu berlaku adil dan mempunyai kemampuan.

Oleh itu kaum lelaki janganlah cuba mengambil kesempatan berpoligami dengan hanya bertujuan memuaskan hawa nafsu tanpa meneliti diri dan memikirkan peringatan dari Allah Subhanahu Wataala dari segi kemampuan dan keadilan. Kerana tanggungjawab berpoligami adalah amat berat berbanding jika mempunyai seorang isteri sahaja. Perlu diingat, pengabaian tanggungjawab seorang suami adalah satu kezaliman, penganiayaan, dan berdosa yang akan menerima balasan siksa di akhirat nanti, sepertimana firman Allah Subhanahu Wataala dalam surah Az-Zukhruf, ayat 65 :-

Tafsirnya :
Maka kecelakaan dan kebinasaanlah bagi orang- orang yang zalim itu, dari paluan azab siksa yang tidak terperi sakitnya pada hari pembalasan.

Perlu juga diingat bahawa pengabaian tanggungjawab boleh memberikan kesan-kesan negatif terhadap rumahtangga yang dibina, di antaranya isteri akan memikul tanggungjawab yang sepatutnya dipikul oleh suami dan akan menguruskan segala-galanya secara bersendirian seperti mencari nafkah, menjaga dan mengasuh anak-anak tanpa bantuan suami. Keadaan ini akan lebih parah lagi apabila isteri tidak mempunyai sebarang pekerjaan dan tiada berpendapatan yang akhirnya mengharapkan belas kasihan orang lain dan tidak terkecuali meminta-minta ehsan orang. Di samping itu anak-anak pula merasa kecewa dan menghadapi tekanan perasaan disebabkan seorang bapa yang tidak bertanggungjawab dan tidak berperi kemanusiaan, sehingga sanggup melihat anak-anak sendiri menderita dan merana, tiada wang untuk belanja sekolah dan membeli keperluan. Keadaan ini menjejaskan pendidikan mereka, kerana terpaksa berhenti sekolah dan ada di antaranya terlibat dengan gejala sosial yang akan menggelapkan masa hadapan mereka.

Sidang Jumaat sekalian,
Negara Brunei Darussalam dalam usaha menjaga kerukunan hidup berkeluarga rakyatnya, telah memperuntukan undang-undang mengenainya iaitu undang-undang keluarga 1999. Walaupun kita banyak membincangkan tentang tanggung jawab suami, pada isteri juga tidak terkecuali dari mempunyai tanggungjawab yang menjadi amanah kepada mereka. Kerana jika hanya suami yang menunaikan tanggungjawabnya sedangkan isteri tidak, keadaan ini juga tidak kurang akan menimbulkan masalah kepada rumahtangga, kerana kebahagiaan rumahtangga hanya akan dirasai dan dinikmati jika suami isteri saling bersefahaman dan bertolak ansur melaksanakan tanggungjawab dan menyelesaikan apa jua masalah yang timbul secara aman dan mengikut ajaran agama Islam.

Firman Allah Subhanahu Wataala dalam surah Ar-Ruum, ayat 21:-

Tafsirnya :
Dan di antara tanda-tanda yang membuktikan kekuasaan nya dan rahmatnya, bahawa ia menciptakan untuk kamu wahai kaum lelaki, isteri-isteri dari jenis kamu sendiri, supaya kamu bersenang hati dan hidup mesra dengannya, dan dijadikannya di antara kamu suami isteri perasaan kasih sayang dan belas kasihan. Sesungguhnya yang demikian itu mengandungi keterangan- keterangan yang menimbulkan kesedaran bagi orang-orang yang berfikir.


Hope that you all find it knowledgable~ In addition to our Kursus Nikah bah ah~ ;)

Bride
xoxo

Wednesday, 28 October 2009

my deco!


Salam... back in my Uni years, me and my friends used to watch this TV show called "Extreme Makeover: HOME Edition". A reality tv show of which the needy gets their house refurbished and we were impressed! Apart from the American Next Top Model.. this too, was another MUST WATCH show for us. Mun d Brunei ada cemani, I want to be part of the team!!! They get everything done in just one week! Workmanshipnya.. phew~ Tiptop! And if dlm "Deko Bersama Eric" he did everything (for a room) in just one day.. this one, they did the WHOLE house, 1 week, demolished and rebuilt! How cool is that..?? Ofcourse, the house is a typical 'Wisteria Lane' type lh ah. Wood. :D And interior deconya... woooooooowwww! I bcame a big fan of interior deco eversince.

Still learning bits and pieces though. But for my room, I just follow my guts! *lol* Remember my stairway deco? I did that on the eve of my nikah and thank God!! Everyone loves it, in fact, it's STILL hanging on our staircase up until now *thumbsup*
  • The very first thing I did with my room was to draw the layout on a piece of paper. i.e arrangements of bed, wardrobe dressing table.. perhaps for some of you, maybe d mana kn menyimpan tv.. access to balcony or maybe ur ensuite bathroom.
  • Secondly, the choice of bedset ... which do you prefer? choice of colour? dark / light?
  • Third comes flooring (tile, laminated, carpeting) and wall paint...my personal view would be just slightly lighter than the furniture (for the whole room) and any total contrast colour as the feature wall, bearing in mind the feature wall IS the room colour theme! A feature wall bleh jua we use wallpaper.. nowadays, there's a wiiiiiiiiiideeeeeeeeeee range of wallpapers offered by interior decorating companies here. So it's your choice~
  • Fourth, my curtain and bedsheets / cover etc. took me several visits to actually confirm my colour and choice of fabric as well as design. Believe me, it was hard for us to come up with simple design (for the bed header) yet look elegant and somewhat different than others... Talk about being fussy! *blush* We spent like an hour plus (on our 3rd visit..yes, THIRD..just for the bed header cos curtain i want it straight and simple saja) to actually confirm the design .. atupun based on her (Sunil's owner) pileS of magazines and curtain decoration books. Rambang mata ani wah!
  • Fifth is the lighting. You either go for a chic chandelier or drop lights.. well, ofcourse depending on the design of your ceiling. My case? A 26 years old living room chandelier really did the trick. It's been in the living room before i was born and now finally, I put it into good use (another reason why i chose the vintage bedset) *lol*


  • Lastly, simplicity deco was my aim. Just bought myself a rug, side table lamp, dressing table runner and artificial 'white roses in a pot' hehehe following my guts? Yes! Atuuuu saja my room decoration.. not much.

I know some bride-to-bes love their rooms to be decorated with fresh flower bouquet on you side table, on the bed.. dressing table and some petals on the bed, again, it is YOUR choice~ :) I chose not to have all those.. ada pun, had I have the time masa atu, it would probably just be the petals.. hehehe but then again, knowing my little nieces and nephews, so.. better I skip that option as well..

A few examples I looked through for my room but only took bits as ideas with improvisation ofcourse~

loving this one except the lamp..

... above the bed needs something..but impressive simple touch..
a bit plain on the feature wall..again I'd say, tampal a few framed pictures above the bed if nda mau pakai kelambu~ ;)
BUT my utmost reference would be MARTHA STEWART's... she's impressive! Please click HERE to surf onto her site~ LOTS of tips there.. design bilik2nya pun LAWA~

Till nxt time peeps... Insya-Allah~

Monday, 19 October 2009

Mas Kahwin (Mahar)

Salam all,

We've been talking much about hantaran lately and my entry today.. it's something for the MEN. I used to wonder mengapa adat kahwin ani ada mas kahwin (well, back in my younger years.. semuanya dipikir adat saja *lol*) I thought untuk hantaran saja rupanya it's part of the wedding, shall i say, 'package'. Masa damit, we don't really bother about this things...yg penting for me enjoy jdi tukang angkat gangsa AND mesti yang chocolate or sweets. The Hensel and Gretle (spelling?) candy house was my favourite hantaran deco. It's not until I realised that everytime Majlis Nikah mesti the groom cakap "..Aku terima nikahnya **** binti **** dengan MAS KAHWINnya $** tunai..." Then I was like, oOoooOooo, andang MESTI rupanya Mas Kahwin ani...

A simpler word, MAHAR. Interesting text below... enjoys~


1. PENGERTIAN MASKAHWIN ( MAHAR ).

Maskahwin adalah pemberian yang wajib diberi oleh suami kepada isterinya dengan sebab perkahwinan.

Firman Allah s.w.t. yang bermaksud :

" Berikanlah kepada orang-orang perempuan itu maskahwin mereka ". ( Surah An-Nisaa' - Ayat 4 )

Sabda Rasulullah s.a.w. yang bermaksud :

"Carilah untuk dijadikan maskahwin walaupun sebentuk cincin yang diperbuat daripada besi ." ( Riwayat Bukhari )

Dari hadith di atas nyatalah bahawa maskahwin boleh dijadikan daripada apa sahaja asalkan benda itu berguna dan berfaedah sama ada berupa wang, barang atau sesuatu yang bermanfaat sebagaimana diberitakan, Rasulullah s.a.w. pernah mengkahwinkan seorang lelaki yang tiada memiliki sesuatu pun untuk dijadikannya maskahwin lalu Rasulullah s.a.w. bertanya kepada lelaki itu, adakah pada engkau (hafaz ) sedikit daripada ayat Al-Qur'an, lelaki itu menyahut bahawa ia mengingati beberapa surah kemudian Rasulullah s.a.w. pun mengahwinkan lelaki itu dengan bermaskahwinkan surah yang diajarkan kepada perempuan yang bakal menjadi isterinya.

Maskahwin itu tidak dihadkan oleh syarak banyak atau sedikit, jadi untuk menentukan banyak atau sedikitnya itu terpulanglah kepada dua pihak di atas persetujuannya dan berdasarkan taraf atau darjat pengantin tersebut dan hukum syarak tidak menggalakkan maskahwin yang terlalu tinggi yang menyebabkan kesukaran bagi pihak lelaki.

Sebagaimana sabda Rasulullah s.a.w. yang bermaksud:

"Sebaik-baik maskahwin ialah yang lebih rendah ". ( Riwayat Abu Daud )

Dan sabda Rasulullah s.a.w. yang bermaksud:

"Sesungguhnya yang besar berkat nikah ialah yang sederhana belanjanya ". ( Riwayat Ahmad )

2. BAHAGIAN-BAHAGIAN MAHAR :

a) Mahar Misil. Iaitu Mahar yang dinilai mengikut maskahwin saudara-saudara perempuan yang telah berkahwin lebih dahulu dan hendaklah yang dinilai sama dengan maskahwin keluarganya yang paling dekat sekali seperti kakak, ibu saudaranya dan seterusnya disamping menilaikan keadaan perempuan itu sendiri dari segi kecantikan, kekayaan, pelajaran dan sebagainya.

b) Mahar Musamma. Iaitu maskahwin yang telah ditetapkan dan telah dipersetujui oleh kedua-dua belah pihak dengan tidak memandang kepada nilai maskahwin saudara-saudara perempuan itu.

3. HUKUM MENYEBUT MASKAHWIN DI WAKTU AKAD NIKAH:

i ) Wajib.

a. Jika bakal isteri itu seorang budak yang masih kecil, gila atau bodoh sedangkan bakal suami ingin membayar mahar yang lebih tinggi dari mahar yang sepatutnya ( Mahar Misil ).

b. Jika bakal isteri yang sudah baligh bijak dan boleh menguruskan dirinya sendiri dan telah membenarkan wali untuk mengkahwinkannya tetapi ia tidak menyerahkan kepada wali untuk menetapkan maskahwinnya.

c. Jika bakal suami itu tidak boleh menguruskan hal dirinya sendiri seperti masih budak, gila atau bodoh dan sebelum akad telah mendapat persetujuan dari bakal isteri tersebut tentang bayaran maskahwin kurang daripada mahar yang sepatutnya, oleh yang demikian maskahwin wajib dinyatakan sebagaimana yang dipersetujui. Maksud wajib disini bukanlah bererti perkahwinan itu tidak sah, tetapi perbuatan itu dianggap berdosa dan maskahwin dibayar mengikut kadar yang sepatutnya ( Mahar Misil ).

ii ) Sunat.

Rasulullah s.a.w tidak pernah meninggalkan dari menyebutnya semasa akad, apabila ia menikahkan orang lain. Dengan menyebutnya semasa akad berlangsung dapat mengelakkan dari berlaku perselisihan, berhubung dengannya, disamping dapat membezakan diantara perkahwinan biasa dengan perkahwinan pada seorang perempuan yang menghebahkan dirinya kepada Rasulullah s.a.w. tanpa mahar. Sekiranya mahar tidak di sebut dimasa akad, tidaklah bererti akad perkahwinan itu tidak sah tetapi makruh jika mahar itu tidak disebut.

4. WAJIB MASKAHWIN

Maskahwin itu wajib dibayar mengikut sebagaimana yang tersebut didalam akad jika dinyatakan dimasa akad dan maskahwin itu wajib dibayar dengan keadaan-keadaan yang berikut:-

i) Apabila suami menetapkan yang ia akan membayarnya sebelum dukhul dan dipersetujui oleh pihak isteri, oleh yang demikian isteri berhak melarang atau meghalang suami dari mensetubuhinya sehingga suami tersebut menentukan kadar maskahwin yang akan diberinya sama ada dengan cara tunai atau hutang, jika dijanjikan tunai maka pihak isteri berhak menghalang suami tersebut dari mensetubuhinya sehingga dijelaskan maskahwinnya itu.

ii) Bila penetapan maskahwin itu dibuat oleh kadi dengan sebab keengkaran pihak suami dari membuat ketetapan atau dengan sebab perbalahan atau perselisihan kedua belah pihak tentang kadar maskahwin tersebut dan bila kadi menentukannya akan maskahwin tersebut, hendaklah dibayar tunai (tidak boleh hutang).

5. GUGUR SEPARUH MASKAHWIN

Apabila berlaku talak sebelum persetubuhan maka gugurlah separuh maskahwin sebagaimana firman Allah ta'ala Yang bermaksud: "Dan jika kamu menceraikan perempuan sebelum persetubuhan sedangkan kamu telah menentukan kepada perempuan tersebut akan maskahwinnya , maka bagi perempuan itu setengah dari apa yang kamu tentukan itu".

Gugur separuh maskahwin sekiranya perceraian ini berlaku berpunca dari pihak suami, seperti suami jadi murtad atau suami menganut Islam dan isterinya tidak. Tetapi sekiranya berlaku perceraian itu berpunca dari pihak isteri, seperti suami memfasakhkan perkahwinan tersebut dengan sebab kecacatan yang ada pada isteri maka maskahwin itu akan gugur semuanya.

6. MATI SUAMI ATAU ISTERI SEBELUM PERSETUBUHAN

Jika seorang suami meninggal dunia sebelum berlaku persetubuhan, pihak waris si suami wajib membayar maskahwin itu sepenuhnya kepada bekas isterinya dan jika maskahwin itu belum ditentukan kadarnya, maka wajib dibayar dengan nilai mahar misil.

Sebaliknya pula jika seorang isteri meninggal dunia sebelum berlaku persetubuhan, pihak suami wajib membayar maskahwin sepenuhnya kepada waris bekas isterinya jika maskahwin itu belum dijelaskan lagi.

Sebagaimana sabda Rasulullah s.a.w. Yang bermaksud:

"Dari Alqamah katanya seorang perempuan telah berkahwin dengan seorang lelaki kemudian lelaki itu mati sebelum sampai mensetubuhi isterinya itu dan maskahwin pun belum ditentukan kadarnya. Kata Ulqamah, mereka mengadu hal tersebut kepada Abdullah, maka Abdullah berpendapat perempuan itu berhak mendapat mahar misil sepenuhnya, dan perempuan itu berhak mendapat pusaka dan wajib pula dengan bereddah. Maka ketika itu Ibnu Ma'kul bin Sanan Al- Saja'i menjelaskan bahawa sesungguhnya Nabi s.a.w. telah memutuskan terhadap Baraq bin Wasaq seperti yang dibuat oleh Abdullah tadi". (Riwayat Al-Tarmidzi)

7. MUT'AH

Mut'ah bererti satu pemberian dari suami kepada isteri sewaktu ia menceraikannya. Pemberian ini adalah wajib diberikan sekiranya perceraian itu berlaku dengan kehendak suami, bukan kemahuan isteri. Banyaknya pemberian itu adalah berdasarkan kepada persetujuan atau keredhaan kedua-dua belah pihak, di samping mempertimbangkan keadaan kedua-duanya sama ada kaya atau miskin dan sebagainya tidak kurang dari separuh mahar.

Firman Allah: Ertinya : Tenangkan olehmu hati mereka dengan pemberian dan lepaskanlah mereka dengan cara yang baik. ( Surah Al-Ahzab ayat 49)

Sunday, 11 October 2009

the daring RED


Salam all...

Was gonna talk about the meaning of the colour RED, but then again.. I think not~ Much has been happening to me the past 2 weeks. Recently, my office had our Hari Raya celebration .. and red happened to be my colour during the event.. hehehe skalinya? That got me thinking, yes.. I should do RED theme this time.

I have read through some of the chats above (didn't get the chance to read all cos byk dh ketinggalan) Internet's being unfriendly with me.. both at home and office.. so yeah~ can't get online la jwpannya~ I can surfed on to this site via my phone, yes, but then again, to comment on the chatango or wedding talks.. tak dapat lah pulak! I am soooooooooooooooo missing everyone in here!!! I miss updating news with you lots and alhamdulillah, I'm glad that sorang2 ada progress dh msani.

Before I proceed with the theme, lemme share with u lots my 7 mths journey on preparing my wedding last August. It's just a summary so if you ladies have any question, feel free to ask yea?
  1. January : got engaged with my husband (25.01.2009) - hehe that's a date to remember ;)
  2. February : surveying bridal boutiques for our desired baju Sanding (to buy kain ourselves or to just rent with our customade design) and book wedding ring
  3. March : doing surveys and shopping for hantarans, buat Jongsarat
  4. April : pelamin booked, taking measurements and designing for all my bajus, furniture bought, photog and MuA booked
  5. May : invitation cards (confirmed and paid deposit), typing out names, room renovation
  6. June : bought all the doorgifts and packaging, printing and sorting out invitation cards, booking for bouquets, room renovation continues
  7. July : handing over of invitation cards, sorting out bunga talors, curtains installed, furniture delivered and room deco, delivered hantaran to SH - picked up 2 days before Nikah.
  8. August : THE Wedding.
Bare in mind, the theme below are just the stuffs I surveyed for mine. (untuk ambil2 idea) hehe

red white pelamin


red deco

red scrolls


Oh yes, to answer bride2bealso's question from my 'Wedding Talks'... susunan yg penting according to this.. Al-Quran (if ada), then Sirih Junjung (if ada), then Mas Kahwin, Jongsarat (if ada), and then cincin.. whilst the rest.. mana saja th tu, to suit its importance ;)

As for me and my hubby's own update, STILL blum lgi we do our post wedding photo shoot and still thinking on when's the best date to go for our honeymoon.. chosen a destination dh.. it'll be KL (shopping and honeymooning) hehehe. Right about now, I'm still sorting out pictures to be develop for our wedding album and photobook.. hmmm. terlampau banyak yg bsai2 bh, so far I've only managed to narrow it down to 500+ pix. Dear photog, please bare with me yeah? Will email you the list soon...

To all, thanks for still visiting this site.. Insya-Allah will try to be online sometime nxt week ani k? Hope to chat with you ladies jua.. :) :) :) Best of Luck!!!

Tuesday, 29 September 2009

SALAM AIDILFITRI


Thought I should make a proper greeting to all my Muslim readers, may this Eid truly brings forgiveness to us all. Without realising, it's already a week plus of endless openhouses invitations to some.. tpi ingat-ingat jua lh, those yg inda berkemampuan k? D 1st week ani, didn't do much raya-ing as I'm pretty much occupied with work (so does hubby)... 1st day ofcourse lh, spent my day at our parents' place. Hehe, tiring but great fun. My family skipped doing our raya convoy ritual this year, why? Cos 3rd day of Raya sorang2 kami going back to work and mengalih kli tu ah~ Soo... kes nda mau kengalihan, berehat saja lh ;)

Just to share with you lots, me and hubby celebrated our "going out" anniversary on the last weekend of Ramadhan (akhirnya sampai hajat kan sungkai out *hugs*) Hehe yeh, our first dinner was in Ramadhan, that's why I love the month so much .. it has a blessing of its own. Teringat jua that time that we have not yet done our POST WED shoot *lol* Oh my!! And yeh... planning to go somewhere nanti but inda jua jauh sgt lh.. In need of retail therapy baby!! So prolly.. hmmm end of the year? Or mayb early nxt yr.. see lh hw it goes~ So now, it's browsing places for our mini honeymoon~ It is afterall the beginning of all honeymoons kan? ;) ;)

To my readers, especially Dk25, YE20, Miss83, Rach8, HisBumblebee (HB), Na21, reader4 and others which I could not mention, wishing all of yous Selamat Hari Raya and the very best of luck for the upcoming wedding preps. I believe Na21's wedding is coming up preeeetty soon~

Theme coming up pretty soon...

Saturday, 19 September 2009

INTERNET Down...

Salam all..

I'm very sorry for I can't update the blog at d moment. My espeed connection is abit koo-koo at d moment..hence, now blogging via my hp. Nasib jua dpt but abit susah kn upload pixies....I bet ryt nw everyone's bz with their Raya preps, not forgetting ada jua yg dub dab dub dab with their upcoming weddings (biasalah, abis bulan puasa, start tia with open houses and ada jua yg d selajuri with wedding ceremonies.. :) ) To all bride to bes of 2009, I wish you all the best..! Enjoy every moment of it, and jgn luan stress2..

Sunday, 13 September 2009

Thanks to...

Salam all..

A month plus has passed, and only 8 days till we celebrate hari raya. This will be my first year celebrating the Eid with my husband...and I hope mudah-mudahan ibadah us all in this holy month of Ramadhan is fully blessed by Allah S.W.T.

I've been meaning to have a sungkai out with the hubby (yes, just the 2 of us..but then sampai now nda kesampaian.. we have other important things to do *sob*) Inda apa, there's always next time.

I know this is a bit late, well..better late than never, but i would like to express my thanks and gratitude to my family and friends for their hard work during my wedding functions. You guys made it possible...my little fruitees for helping out with the campur packaging, mummy and our maid with the mlm bebadak packaging, Dad with his guidance and advices and others yg terlibat..
  1. My official photog - UcingItam, can't wait for the album!~ hehehe I have yet to get my softcopies frm him
  2. Official MuA - Syazlie
  3. MuA for Mlm Bebadak - Hjh Rohaya of Roza Rohaya
  4. Nikah and Sanding (for kids) campur - Taste On Tray,
  5. Caterers - Hj. Zainal Catering (Sanding), Restoran As-Salam (Mlm Bebadak) ... Nikah (a mix of few caterers) ~ thanks to my parents yg mau negotiating the caterers
  6. Nikah, Berbadak and Muleh 7 attire - S&S Boutique, Kg. Lumut
  7. Sanding Attire + Accessories - KHJ Bridal Boutique
  8. Pelaminan (Sanding & Basuh Kaki) - Ruzz Pelamin Enterprise @ Batu Bersurat
  9. Decorative Lanterns & Fresh flower bouquet - Roz Flower Boutique @ Serusop
  10. Accessories for Nikah & Bebadak - Myzura Bridal Gallery @ Kiulap
  11. Curtains, Header, Bedsheet, Duvet and Pillow Covers - Sunil Emporium @ Tutong Town
  12. Entertainment - CitraSeni
Thank you to all.. mudah-mudahan business bertambah maju, insya-Allah~ Wishing everyone a happy Sunday ;)

Wednesday, 2 September 2009

the bajus,,,

Salam all...

Hehhehe I see byk yg really want to know my baju2.... lambat bah ah c Bride ani (I know~) It took me sometime to organise all my pictures (from my very own camera) into the right folders.. yes, I am that fussy, different pics shud go to different folders. Sorry again.. but what I'm about to share with you all now prolly would entice everyone. Hehehe it's on how I come up with making my own baju (except for Sanding) rather than renting them all out. Now for those yang sudah survey sana sini, you all know the basic price for renting out baju songket / nikah sepasang starts with a minimum price of $350.. if a couple decided to have 1 function saja, then by all means... do this :) But me, well..~ had to really calculate and manage by budget well.

1. The Nikah attire, since it's all white.. I figure, I may have it for me own.. kegunaan masa depan (say, official ceremonies?) What I had in mind was to create a chiffon baju kurung with white and silver beads...and lace pun I want yg simple one saja.. all white~ not creamish white.. but white, white.. Tpi entah somehow, the time when I was looking for d chiffon... sana sini takde~ hence i ended up buying a package deal for lace and satin sepsg (bride and groom) @ Euro Moda in K.L. I made mine to just a simple baju kurung fesyen design.. at least, the price sewing it was cheap had to pay extra for the kain sja cos I had to ask my tailor to do lace patching.. pun it turn out alright :) :)




2. The Berbedak attire : the thought of wearing traditional Brunei Malay attire for this event, I was like, jgn th tabal2 material bajunya ani... if sewa saja possible around $350 min. (for baju) + the attire lagi.. mau2 jua $600 jdinya right? So I thought, what if I can get everything below $350... get a plain kain, buat beadings and I can wear it for a function or apa nanti kan... and since, my darling hubby wants a blue jongsarat with gold threads (bepakan amas) Jaaadinyaaaa.... behold~



This was, I must say, 'last minute' plan... the initial plan was to wear the same baju I've worn for Muleh 7 for Berbedak event, BUT since sayang jua kain untuk hantaran atu inda d jahit kan? (with Raya coming and all) So just hantar kedai.. design it in such a way that it doesn't appear simple.. nor will it appear too fancy. Karang mcm christmas tree susah jua tu! and.. yeh, the price of my own baju + rental of accessories < rental of baju songket ONLY (so u see how much I saved kan?)

3. Sanding attire.. both darling Hubby and I wanted to wear original songket bunga tabur with silver threads. Yes.. it was pretty tiresome scouting for the actual blood red songket with silver threads but the end result was tiptop. We had ours custommade to our designs at KHJ Bridal Boutique nda nyasal lh mbuat disana... :) Modern & classic design was our theme..with the material of just PURE songket with silver beadings... simple but elegant at an affordable price. *thumbsup*

4. Muleh 7 Attire.. bought it at the same place where I bought my nikah attire. package too! harga kain + tailoring (tmpt biasa saja) + rental of sinjang and dastar = rental of songket (both male and female) with accessories. not much difference here.. but at least we get to keep the attire kan. Plus if we were to send it over @ any bridal boutiques gerenti the price would be like rental of 2 songket sets.. so yeh, jahit d kadai biasa saja.. :D I trust my tailor.. cost us just 20% off the normal price if we were to send our attire @ a local bridal shop.. :D :D :D pic of the baju? hahaha nanti th I upload, silly me to forget capturing the picture of this one *lol*

Wednesday, 26 August 2009

p.i.n.k.


Salam all..

it's been raining the past few days and I'm freezing cold in the office! Yes, Bride is back to work.. back to the normal routine (of working). Anyhoos.. as promised, a new wedding theme for this week.. PINK is the new BLACK! don't u think?

this lace is a beauty, even if ur guy refuse to wear this colour, u can always match it with the colour of your kain.. green perhaps?

This is a design I would suggest for baju nikah or Berbedak, loving the pink designs on the white baju.. stunning!

another lace combining pink and peach.. lawa jua ah~ why didn't i go for this colour last time? *thinks*

This will be the set for his hantaran or ambil2an reception menu.. cuteness!!! I had the idea of doing my hubby's hantaran like these.. tpi naah~ simple2 designs saja...

cake looks simple and yummy...

I did my fresh flower bouquet at Roz Flower Boutique last time, where I also rented my outdoor decors as well. Bouquet was cheaper than any other flower boutiques I've been to and the price is inclusive with delivery! (Oh yes, for everyone's info they also do flower deco for your rooms.. for those yg mau fresh flower decos for your rooms~)

This is an example of pink roses for your big day bouquet..

table deco... nice~ for Raya ok jua ni..dining table deco? no?

Next, wedding favors ... door gifts.. campur as we called it..

the fan~

the picture holder (yg budget tinggi lh ah~)

the candles (universal sikit)

and ofcourse, the Pelamins... simple and sweet..



Last but not the least, collages of pink themes.. ;)

As AEROSMITH put it in their song ".. Pink, it's the colour of passion cause today it just goes with the fashion... " - like I said earlier, Pink is the new Black... so why not try this theme..? Until the next entry insya-Allah~

HAPPY FASTING to ALL!!!

Friday, 21 August 2009

Marhaban Ya Ramadhan


WISHING MY DEAR FAMILY, FRIENDS and READERS a blissful month of Ramadhan.
Jangan skip puasa tau (ladies d fahami lh ah~ max. th 14 days tu!) .. and don't forget to recite your niat puasa Ramadhan... :)

from : Bride & my darling Hubby

p/s: 1st time puasa with hubby... *hehehe* Another wedding update coming up next week..I bliev it's 'theme' time ;) ;)

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

something, sumthing..

Salam all..

Mohon maaf atas entry yg 'tertunggak' (word?). Was about to publish an entry the other day but then... hmmmm, let it be lah yea~ Last Sunday was Muleh 7 Hari.. a function held secara sederhana saja, kira 'families ONLY' lh and wah! I was having butterflies the whoooooooole day! Lots of things playing in my mind.. like, apa saja th ni krg? how do I present myself? abis th ku niii...mothernya sporting plg ni..tapi aunty-auntynya cemana? the granny?? What if they don't like me? OMG!! OMG!! Yes, I was that panic, still is, until God knows when...guys cemani jua rasanya kah masa mula2 durang tidur rumah tani?? Teeeellll meeeeeeeeeeee~~~~ But yeh,
keep on telling myself, be strong, ur husband's right next to you.. I'm sure whatever constraints, we both can do this together...he will support you in whatever way~ Insya-Allah *Amin*

To those of you yang belum lagi start kursus... actually ani ada plg termasuk dlm one of the Kursus Nikah chapters... just felt like sharing it with all of yous~

TANGGUNGJAWAB SEORANG ISTERI


TAAT
Tanggungjawab utama seorang isteri ialah isteri perlulah taat dan patuh kepada suaminya. Kesetiaan isteri kepada suaminya perlu diutamakan terlebih dahulu lebih daripada keluarga terdekatnya sendiri.
Ini berdasarkan kepada sabda Rasulullah SAW:

Sekiranya aku ini orang yang menyuruh mana-mana orang supaya sujud kepada orang lain tentu sekali aku akan menyuruh isteri sujud kepada suaminya. (Riwayat Abu Daud dan al-Hakim)
Isteri hendaklah mematuhi perintah si suami asalkan ia tidak bertentangan dengan ajaran Islam. Andainya suami menyuruh melakukan dosa maka isteri dibenarkan membantah.

Sabda Rasulullah SAW:

Tidak boleh mentaati mahluk dalam perkara menderhaka kepada Allah SWT. (Riwayat Ahmad)
Setelah berkahwin, suami mempunyai hak ke atas isteri. Oleh sebab itu, jika isteri ingin keluar rumah atau berpuasa sunat, ia hendaklah meminta izin daripada suami.

Sabda Rasulullah SAW:

Tidak halal bagi sesorang isteri yang beriman dengan Allah dan hari akhirat untuk berpuasa, sedangkan suaminya ada di sampingnya kecuali dengan keizinan suaminya itu. (Riwayat al-Bukhari, Muslim, dan Ahmad Ibn Hanbal)
Larangan berpuasa tanpa keizinan suami ini diwujudkan kerana dikhuatiri si isteri tidak dapat melayan kemahuan si suami dengan baik. Oleh sebab itu, meminta izin adalah sangat penting.


MELAYAN SUAMI
Si isteri juga hendaklah melayan kehendak suami dengan baik pada bila-bila masa sahaja. Hubungan yang perlu dijaga ialah hubungan kelamin antara kedua-duanya. Oleh sebab itu, si isteri hendaklah memastikan bahawa ia melayan kehendak suaminya.

Sabda Rasulullah SAW:

Apabila seorang suami mengajak isterinya ke tempat tidur, tetapi ia enggan melayan ajakan suaminya, maka suami tidur dengan marah pada waktu malam itu, nescaya malaikat mengutuknya sampai waktu subuh. (Riwayat sebahagian Ahli Sunnah)

Untuk mengelakkan daripada digolongkan dalam golongan yang ingkar, maka isteri perlulah memenuhi kemahuan si suami jika tidak mempunyai alasan yang kukuh untuk menolaknya.


MENGURUS RUMAHTANGGA

Tugas seorang isteri ialah untuk menjadikan tempat tinggalnya sebagai satu tempat untuk berehat serta menghasilkan persekitaran yang menyenangkan. Isteri hendaklah menghias rumah itu supaya ia kelihatan damai dan rasa senang hati untuk tinggal di situ. Untuk menghias rumah itu, si isteri perlulah menghias mengikut kemampuan keperluan keluarga itu. Citarasa hiasan dalaman itu bergantung kepada suami isteri asalkan ia tidak melanggar hukum Islam.

Apabila si suami memberi wang perbelanjaan kepada si isteri, maka si isteri mestilah berbelanja dengan bijak serta tidak membazir-bazirkan wang pemberian suaminya. Si isteri hendaklah berbelanja mengikut keperluan dan bukannya hawa nafsu. Si isteri mestilah memahami keadaan ekonomi suami yang sibuk mencari nafkah yang mencukupi untuk keluarganya. Oleh sebab itu, si isteri hendaklah membuat perbelanjaan keluarganya dengan bijak supaya tidak ada perbelanjaan melebihi pendapatan. Maka, si isteri hendaklah berjimat- cermat dalam membuat pembelian supaya suami isteri itu hidup dalam serba kesederhanaan sahaja. Tanggungjawab Bersama.

Pengurusan rumahtangga adalah tanggungjawab seorang isteri. Walaupun mempunyai pembantu rumah, isteri masih bertanggungjawab untuk menyelia segala pengurusan rumah itu. Suami pula diharapkan dapat membantu si isteri dalam melakukan kerja-kerja rumah. Dengan adanya kerjasama daripada kedua-dua belah pihak, maka akan wujudlah sebuah keluarga bahagia serta dapat merapatkan lagi hubungan sesama mereka.


MENJAGA MARUAH DIRI, SUAMI DAN KELUARGA
Sebagai seorang isteri, isteri hendaklah menjaga maruah dan akhlak terutamanya apabila keluar dari rumah. Apabila si isteri keluar rumah kerana sebab-sebab tertentu seperti bekerja, melawat sanak saudara atau keluar membeli-belah, pakaian yang dipakai hendaklah menutup aurat dan tidak menjolok mata, berjalan dengan cara yang tidak menarik perhatian ramai serta berkelakuan baik. Si isteri perlulah menundukkan pandangan serta menjauhkan dirinya daripada segala fitnah yang mungkin akan berlaku.


Firman Allah:


Hai Nabi, katakanlah kepada isteri-isterimu, anak-anak perempuanmu dan isteri-isteri orang mukmin:
"Hendaklah mereka menghulurkan Jilbabnya ke seluruh tubuh mereka". Yang demikian itu supaya mereka lebih mudah untuk dikenal, kerana itu mereka tidak diganggu. Dan Allah adalah Maha Pengampun lagi Maha Penyayang."
(Al-Ahzab: 59)

Seperti juga tanggungjawab si suami terhadap si isteri, segala kecacatan yang ada pada si suami hendaklah dirahsiakan. Ini adalah untuk mengelakkan perasaan aib timbul yang boleh menjurus kepada perbalahan. Sudah tentu perbalahan seperti ini perlulah dielakkan kerana ia boleh mengganggu pembentukan keluarga bahagia.


MENYENANGKAN HATI SUAMI
Apabila si suami memberikan pemberian dalam apa sahaja bentuk, adalah menjadi tanggungjawab si isteri untuk menghargai pemberian suami itu. Si isteri tidak boleh meminta-minta hadiah daripada si suami yang melebihi daripada kemampuannya. Jika mendapat hadiah walaupun yang kecil sahaja, isteri hendaklah menghargainya dan tidak mengkritik-kritik bentuk hadiah itu.


Dalam pepatah Arab ada menyebut:

Accept the little I may give you, my love for you will grow deeper, and raise not your voice in my presence, especially when I am in a moody crisis.

(Imam al-Ghazzali)
Untuk menyenangkan hati si suami melihat si isteri, maka si isteri haruslah menjaga dirinya supaya kelihatan ceria dan menarik. Ketika berada di dalam rumah, si isteri perlulah mengenakan solekan yang sewajarnya agar suami tertarik hati melihatnya. Si isteri juga hendaklah memakai wangi-wangian yang boleh menarik perhatian si suami.

Seorang perempuan tua Arab ada menasihatkan anaknya pada hari perkahwinannya:

O my daughter! You are leaving the home in which you brought up for a house unknown to you and to a companion unfamiliar to you. Be a floor to him, he will be a roof to you; be a soft seat to him, he will be a pillar for you; and be like a slave girl to him and he will be a slave boy to you. Avoid inopportune behaviour, least he should be bored with you; and be not aloof lest he should become indifferent to you. If he approaches you, come running to him; and if he turns away, do not impose yourself upon him. Take care of his nose, his eye and his ear. Let him not smell except a good odour from you; let not his eye see you except in an agreeable appearance; and let him hear nothing from you except nice, fine words.

(Imam al-Ghazzali)


PENDORONG DAN MEMBERI MOTIVASI
Isteri yang solehah seharusnya menjadi teman berunding bagi suami, menjadi sahabt dalam menyelesaikan masalah. Itulah sebabnya hubungan suami isteri itu diertikan orang sebagi "teman hidup". Jika suami menghadapi masalah untuk mencapai cita-citanya dan keluarganya, maka berilah motivasi kepada suami disamping menghiburkan hatinya.

Dalam sesebuah institusi keluarga, ahli-ahlinya perlulah bersama-sama memikul tanggungjawab supaya pembentukan keluarga bahagia akan tercapai. Dalam hal yang sedemikian, terdapat beberapa tanggungjawab yang dipikul bersama oleh suami isteri. Kedua-duanya perlulah mendalami ilmu fardu ain. Ini adalah perlu kerana ilmu ini merupakan panduan untuk mereka dalam menjalani kehidupan seharian. Kita juga wajib menuntut ilmu sampai ke liang lahad. Dengan mempelajari lebih banyak ilmu fardu ain, suami isteri dapat menghayati kehidupan Islam lebih bermakna lagi.

Untuk menyelesaikan apa juga masalah keluarga, suami isteri perlulah sentiasa berbincang demi kebaikan bersama. Perbincangan adalah lebih baik daripada bersikap autokratik kerana kata sepakat dapat dicapai untuk kebaikan bersama dan tidak untuk kepentingan satu pihak sahaja. Malah, dengan perbincangan juga suami isteri boleh mendapat ilham baru untuk menyelesaikan masalah yang dihadapi bersama. Dalam menunaikan tanggungjawab masing-masing, kadang-kadang kita memerlukan pertolongan dalam hal-hal kebajikan.

Isteri kadang-kadang memerlukan pertolongan si suami untuk membuat kerja-kerja rumah. Dalam hal sebegini, adalah perlu bagi pasangannya untuk meringankan beban yang dihadapi oleh pasangannya supaya kerja-kerja dapat dilaksanakan dengan cepat dan betul. Apabila seorang daripada mereka melakukan perkara yang ditegah, adalah menjadi tanggungjawab pasangannya untuk menegur kesilapan yang telah dilakukan. Suami isteri hendaklah saling tegur menegur dan menghalang pasangan masing-masing daripada melakukan kemungkaran, sebaliknya melakukan lebih banyak hal-hal kebajikan.

Kedua-duanya perlulah bersikap jujur dan selalu menepati janji antara satu sama lain kerana perkahwinan dianggap sebagai satu institusi yang mana ahli-ahlinya perlulah saling percaya mempercayai antara satu lama lain tanpa perlu berbohong atau menyimpan rahsia. Oleh sebab itulah maka suami isteri hendaklah bersikap terbuka dan berterus terang dalam banyak hal tanpa menyembunyikan kebenaran.

Suami isteri perlulah saling memaafkan dan menasihati kerana sebagai manusia, kita tidak dapat lari daripada melakukan kesilapan. Ini adalah penting kerana tanpa sikap pemaaf dan saling tegur menegur ini, maka suami isteri itu akan hidup dalam kekacauan kerana sering melakukan kesilapan tanpa ada orang yang ingin menegurnya ataupun sering berbalah kerana tidak ada sikap pemaaf itu.

Salah satu hikmah berkahwin ini ialah suami isteri dapat melakukan solat berjemaah. Seperti yang diketahui, jika kita solat berjemaah, maka pahala yang diperolehi adalah berganda-ganda daripada solat secara sendiri. Dengan melakukan solat berjemaah ini maka perhubungan ukhwah antara suami isteri dapat dipereratkan. Yang paling penting dalam kehidupan sebagai suami isteri ini ialah bertawakal kepada Allah setelah berusaha sedaya upaya untuk mencapai kebahagiaan dalam hidup berumahtangga.



KESIMPULAN
Secara kesimpulannya, dapatlah kita lihat bahawa perkahwinan ini adalah penting dalam sesebuah masyarakat kerana keluarga merupakan batu asas dalam pembinaan sesebuah masyarakat. Untuk melahirkan sesebuah masyarakat yang bahagia, kita perlulah memastikan bahawa ahli-ahli masyarakat itu menjalankan tanggungjawab masing-masing. Untuk melahirkan masyarakat yang yang kuat, mulia, dan saling bertangungjawab, pembentukan keluarga yang bahagia adalah sangat penting. Oleh sebab itu, adalah penting untuk membentuk sesebuah keluarga bahagia.

.............and for that, I end today's entry. I have to get ready before my darling hubby's back from playing footie.

Sunday, 16 August 2009

Sanding..

Salam all...

Today will be the last of my 4 events, it's Muleh 7 Hari.. nervous? yes. anxious? yes. What more can you ask.. bet this is how my husband felt last week.
 

Last week was the Sanding Ceremony... a good turn up amongst my friends and relatives. And man, was I sleepy! Today better sikit, last week can only sleep soundly around 2.30a.m and then I hav to wake up around 6.30a.m. Get myself ready before my M.u.A's arrival which was around 9.00a.m. Hubby didn't text me at all that morning.. I would xpect so cos ia pun ada Majlis Berbedak pagi2 atu. But alhamdulillah, his arrival was on schedule... rombongannya saja late sikit. 

MuA did a fine job with the make-up... no wait, a GREAT job~ and I finished on schedule...*Alhamdulillah* Though had to get help with sis to put on the corset (andang design of the baju). I sooooo loooove the baju banar2!! Rasanya kan dibuy so that orng inda pakai lgi but wth, kan di apa jua simpan? Jadi ristaan saja jua tu behabuk dlm almari. Baju lain tu bleh laa... besides, WE'RE THE FIRST to wear that baju kan? The songket yg hard to find arh other boutiques ah *lol* (masa atu plg tu.. dont knw masa ani) Everyone's comment : You guys managed to pull it off!! Jarang org dpt wear that colour and looks gorgeous in it! (Hmm, wallahuwa'lam~ to me, each baju pengantin is stunning in their own ways..)

It's already 7:19a.m and I need to shower before anything... time of departure from my place would be 11:00a.m. .... nervous again? YES!!!!!!!! 

Tawakkaltualallah~

Friday, 14 August 2009

Berbedak...

Salam all...

Back then, I always question myself.. mengapa kna buat Majlis Berbedak for a wedding function? I know some would say... 'Andangnya sudah mesti ada...mau jua kn pakai pakaian Brunei kan...?' but is it really what we need? So I question myself... why did I do it? Truthfuly speaking.. I once talked to my parents of not wanting the ceremony to be held (constrained budget).. and they were like 'eh baik jua, dorg adi-beradi mu ya juanya...' 

As a true Tutong folk, actually kami nda necessary memakai pakaian Brunei (all the ayam-ayam, naga and the likes).. but then again, I do have a little bit of Brunei-Muara blood in me.. (Mulah Nini Bini frm Dad's side) Kali Mum tanya, "Ko pakai pakaian Brunei kh nda ni? Kaka mu dlu pakai jua"  and my Sis was like... "Dang... pakai saja tia! bila jua masanya lgi~"   Sekalinya, "pakai eh.. sayang jua~" :D Rented out my pakaian Brunei from Myzura Bridal Gallery @ Kiulap, 1st floor above the photo shop yg sebaris AV Electronics, Virgo Boutique.. etc. Based on my surveys last time.. most bridal boutiques rented out the pakaian Brunei @ the same price..hence, cari saja mana yg available 1 set atu..~ For my little fruities yg nda tau pasal pakaian ani.. they were like "Waaahh lawa jua, tpi knapa pakai atu? Knapa crownnya lain??" Haha kids nowadays~

Back to why we do berbedak ceremonies... in the olden days (as told by Dad), yg membadaki ani bukan orang calang-calang... normally it'll b the Elderly relatives. In a way, to me, it's one way  to have them gather round and bestow us, the Pengantins, their blessings..besertakan do'a from all lah tu ah. Some families still do the Adat Meng-aga-i (i.e groom's family ke rumah the Bride and vice versa)...of which, we don't practice and I dare not comment anything regarding that matter... that for sure is a lengthy one, sudah th family diri, family 'dangan' lagi.. fuuuhh!! Kul 11 a.m kli? I guess that's why nowadays jrg lgi dipractice by some.. and the fact that the berbedak function is mostly done on the same day of the Bersanding / Nikah hehe~ 

Right, the eve before my Berbedak function, me and sis, did the Bunga Telor... 

150eggs boiled by the amahs
this is only part of the flowers.. lady in the background is dearest mummy... 
(Chief Supervisor of the night *lol*)
the blue flowers for the Dzikir team

To top it off, all the flowers ada cute little bells so imagine sja cana bunyinya bila mbagi arh org *winks* All the gifts for guests, for org membadaki and Dzikir members were 'sold out' that night... Syukur, Alhamdulillah~ Can't wait for the pix from all the peeps nanti.. 

Until the nxt entry...
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